Every business needs a bright spark now and then...

Every business needs a bright spark now and then...

We LOVE developing creative ideas, designs and marketing strategies for small businesses. Read More

DUCKS IN A ROW...

DUCKS IN A ROW...

We offer a "pick 'n' mix" range of marketing services and advice that will help you get your marketing and business ducks in a row. Read More

 

Men Vs Women

I got sent this in one of those chain type emails and thought it was soooo funny (even though I am a woman) that I had to share it with you.  Here goes:

MEN ARE  JUST HAPPIER PEOPLE!

NICKNAMES:

  • If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.
  • If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT:

  • When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in £20, even though it’s only for £32.50. None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit to wanting any change back.
  • When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY:

  • A man will pay £2 for a £1 item he needs.
  • A woman will pay £1 for a £2 item that she doesn’t need but it’s on sale.

BATHROOMS:

  • A man has six items in his  bathroom:  toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel .
  • The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS:

  • A woman will always have the last word in any argument.
  • Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

FUTURE:

  • A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
  • A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife…

SUCCESS:

  • A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
  • A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE:

  • A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn’t.
  • A man marries a woman expecting that she won’t change, but she does.

DRESSING  UP:

  • A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
  • A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL:

  • Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
  • Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING:

  • Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.
  • A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY:

  • A married man should forget his mistakes. There’s no use in two people remembering the same thing!

Proof that Men Have Better  Friends:

Friendship among  Women:

A woman didn’t come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend’s house. The man called his wife’s 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.

Friendship among Men:

A  man didn’t come home one night. The next morning he told his wife that he had  slept over at a friend’s house. The woman called her husband’s 10 best  friends. Eight confirmed that he had slept over, and two said he was still  there.